The year is 1543. After much work and writing, Nicolaus Copernicus is about to change the world. But first, he will cause much controversy and ruffle many feathers by challenging the status quo. He will go on to say that the earth isn’t central to the universe. In fact the earth actually revolves around the sun, and not the other way around. Copernicus’s discovery is a given today in modern science, but at that time his claims were offensive. How dare he say that the universe doesn’t revolve around us! Yet today, even though people know the earth revolves around the sun, many tend to think that the world revolves around them.
In essence, that’s what it means to be entitled. According to the dictionary, to be entitled means, “believing oneself to be inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment.” With it comes an air of arrogance, which is nauseating for all who get a whiff. Now of course, everyone wants special privileges and treatment as well as perks and upgrades. Sure, who doesn’t? But not at the expense of others. Or do we? I mean, no one wants to be described as entitled, right? However, our generation is becoming known for its entitlement. As a result, we are only harming ourselves and setting the generations that follow us up for failure.
You can’t be self-absorbed and look to God at the same time. Click To TweetSo how exactly is being entitled harmful? Since entitlement makes it all about us, we become too fixated on the self. You can’t be self-absorbed and look to God at the same time. If our focus is on ourselves, we will ultimately miss out on what God is wanting to do. Especially since we serve God and His purposes, and not the other way around (remember Copernicus?). Not only that, to be entitled is to ultimately be powerless. Why? Because you are at the mercy of what happens to you or what you get, which in turn makes you a victim to circumstances and other people. So the opposite of entitled is to be empowered. As believers, we are not powerless nor are we victims, but we are powerful people who have been given the amazing blessing of choice. We don’t have to let what happens dictate who we are or how we act, but we can choose. Like most things in life, we are not what happens to us, but how we respond. (As a side note character isn’t a static thing. It’s not something you either have or you don’t. Instead, character is what you choose to develop!) We have been empowered to be like Christ! We get to choose Christlikeness! So here are a few ways you have been empowered to overcome entitlement.
GRATITUDE
What if I told you I knew God’s will for your life? Well, you’re in luck because the Bible explains it clearly! Apostle Paul in 1 Thessalonians 5:18 tells us, “…give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” It doesn’t say feel thankful, but rather to give thanks. Giving thanks then is God’s will for your life! In the Kingdom, giving is tied to action motivated by choice, more than it is to a feeling. For example, no one gives a sacrifice because it feels good, otherwise it wouldn’t be called a sacrifice! The same can go with thanksgiving. Because we are powerful people, we don’t have to feel a certain way in order to give thanks. In fact gratitude isn’t what causes us to give thanks, but rather the result of us giving thanks. In other words, gratitude is the fruit of giving thanks regardless of what we feel. This is so important because people who are entitled are ungrateful. They have forgotten how truly blessed they are and how everything they have is a gift (James 1:17).The truth is we all have been given more than we deserve, and it has nothing to do with how deserving we think we are.
CONNECTION
We can only know that to be true when we become connected to not only our own story of how far we have come, but to a narrative bigger than our own. I remember a couple years ago, I was driving into NYC for work after a huge blizzard hit the whole region. The commute was an absolute nightmare! It took over two hours just to get to the office. I was grumbling and complaining as my car moved at a snail’s pace. Then all of a sudden, it dawned on me that my family has been making this same exact commute into the city for over twenty years, yet I never once heard them complain. In that moment, I was reconnected to the story of years of dedication and sacrifice in light of my own temporary discomfort. I knew I still had some growing up to do. I still had so much room to mature. I was thankful for this loving rebuke and reminder from the Holy Spirit and repented for my entitled attitude. When I begin to connect to the stories of others and the price they paid and what they had to suffer so that I can be where I am today, I start to have clarity. Only when I am connected can I start to see properly. Only then can I have the right perspective. Entitled people are disconnected people. Disconnected to reality. Disconnected to others and even to their own stories since no one is self-made. They are also disconnected to the bigger story of God’s Kingdom. The Bible tells us that we are not our own (1 Corinthians 6:19) and that it’s no longer even us who live, but Christ lives in us (Galatians 2:20). We live for more than just ourselves when we connect to God and His bigger Kingdom narrative.
SERVICE
When we are connected to God and others, we see that our greatest privilege in the Kingdom as beloved and empowered sons and daughters is to serve. I love what it says in John 13:4. “Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he had come from God and was returning to God.” Basically it is saying that Jesus knew His identity, His purpose, where He came from, and where He was going. He knew He had all power and all authority. So what did He do with that kind of revelation? What was the result of Him fully understanding the weight of it all? He served! He humbled Himself to wash His disciples’ feet. Wow! If anyone deserved to be served, it was Jesus. Yet He said He didn’t come to be served, but to serve (Matthew 20:28). It’s amazing how powerful service is to the human spirit. Service is purifying. Service is liberating. Service is empowering. Serving others reminds us that so many are less fortunate than we are while also teaching us that it truly is more blessed to give than to receive (Acts 20:35). Entitled people don’t serve because they think it’s their right to be served. All the while, they are the ones missing out. They are only robbing themselves of true blessing — the blessing of service.
HONOR
When people demand to be served, then others are viewed as objects and pawns at best and a nuisance and obstacles at worst. Therefore performance is valued above grace and judgment triumphs over mercy, and not the other way around (James 2:13). As a result, nothing is more countercultural today than honor. To honor is to treat all with dignity and esteem others as our Heavenly Father would Himself. Philippians 2:3-4 is a perfect description of what that looks like. Apostle Paul writes, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.” Entitled people simply cannot do that. Entitled people don’t honor. Bill Johnson says that to honor someone means to recognize who they are without stumbling over who they are not. When you decide to carry honor in your heart for others, it is not necessarily because they are honorable, but because you are honorable. Respect might be earned, but honor is freely given. As a result honor says more about the person giving it than the person receiving it. That’s why it is so tragic when God’s people react the same as the world does. Simply put, disrespect is never justified. (However this does not mean tolerating injustice or being okay with wrongdoing, but all of those things can still be dealt with in honor.) When you honor, you are taking on the character of Christ and are overcoming entitlement.
Entitlement might be able to get you what you want at the moment. But in the long run, it will only disqualify you from all the amazing things God has! There’s a better alternative, and that’s to live empowered. Entitled people make it about themselves, whereas empowered people make it about others and God. They know their source of power is from God and they have been given it for the sake of something bigger than themselves. Gratitude, connection, service, and honor all work together and fuel each other so that we can partner with God to see His dream of us becoming like Jesus come to pass, and also for His Kingdom to be established not only in our generation, but in the generations to come. Each time we fight and choose those things, we are overcoming entitlement. That’s what truly sets us up for God’s best. Up until now, each preceding generation has been known for becoming more and more entitled, but let’s change the tide by overcoming entitlement in our generation so that each generation that follows will instead be more empowered than the last. Let’s create an inheritance and legacy of empowerment, and not entitlement! Amen.
- What can you give thanks for right now? What can you give thanks for this week?
- Which narrative do you need to strengthen your connection to? Your roots? His Kingdom? etc.
- How can you serve in the coming days? Who can you serve?
- Who are you struggling to honor? Where do you struggle to honor the most? Ask God to show you what He loves most about the person(s) you have a hard time honoring, and give praise for that.